PINKYLEONA

Just a day after we celebrated my mom's birthday, my (step) dad collapsed and being taken to the National Cancer Institute (NCI). His health is already deteriorating at that time. I remember being the one who noticed his white eyes turned yellow, pretty sure his liver is no longer in good condition.

He has been battling with cancer since 2015

On January 10th, 2019, he passed away at the age of 54, in the NCI

Weeks before, one morning (5am), he called upon my Husband and I, seeking forgiveness and all (advice, wishes), I remember going back to KL (from my hometown) crying. I have such a weak heart, emotional as always

2 weeks after -I still cannot find words to describe how I feel

I NO LONGER HAVE A FATHER FIGURE

Lost my dad, and then my step dad. Lost so many people, my own daughter, went through one (1) miscarriage. Sad is never the correct term now

I hate being where I am now, hoping everything will turn out better hereafter..



THEY SAY, "YOU NEVER MISS THE WELL RUNS DRY"

My dad always mentioned -his only wish is to be free from the pain. God knows just how he felt at that time. Just like pregnancy (has additional uneasiness/sores/back/hip pain), the pain lingers, but this one is forever

Health is one's greatest possession. Although this whole cancer thing, is mysterious. Thankfully, none from my bloodline has cancer (yet), not even my 90 year old grandmother. But in the future, we'll never know

WHAT I NEED FROM EVERYONE

Still, I did not know what I want, I feel numb

Anyway, it is still very nice if I can have your time for prayers and wishes, may those I have lost find peace and will be granted Heaven

AL-FATIHAH

..to those we love so dearly (especially my late daughter, my first born Elana)



MAY WE MEET AGAIN

I have been meaning to write about this, even before Seff's 1st Birthday coming up

However I am afraid this might send wrong signals to my friends and family who is attending Seff's Birthday party last year. But to be honest, I secretly hope that Seff will receive either toy or book. But he received more money than toys >.< 

Note : Half a thousand to be exact, will be directly going into his savings

My ideas of a perfect gift is something that lasts long enough to be used for 3 years more, highly doubted that toys can last that long. I favor book a little bit more, but I have a super hard time choosing any. Been into Bookstores for hours, but I went out with none (bought my own book instead)

My (initial) ideal gift would be : an Encyclopedia with a lot of photos and facts

Since I found none that matches with my taste, I found the next best thing :

1. DOONA LIKI TRIKE

(Price : refer https://simpleparenting.co/liki-trike/)

Although not always mentioned this, but I loveeeeee Doona Car Seat/Stroller therefore I'll buy anything they are selling *waving*

I love that the trike is compact, foldable and light enough to be carried around and so far, I already tested bringing this to the mall, open and fold it when I am with Seff ALONE and it was a success! *proud* 

Love that we will be using this up to 3 years old, or whenever Seff knows how to ride a bike. This is to me a very good tricycle (and training bicycle) for a baby. Say no more..

2. (IT IS A TIE BETWEEN) VTECH SIT TO STAND LEARNING WALKER

(Price : refer https://www.vtechkids.com/product/detail/479/Sit_to_Stand_Learning_Walker)

& SKIP HOP EXPLORE & MORE BABY'S VIEW 3-STAGE ACTIVITY CENTER

(Price : refer https://www.skiphop.com/skiphop-nursery-and-gear/V_303325.html)

I would not want to comment on the use of a walker/jumper, but I noticed these two has activities that Seff likes. We tried the latest Skip Hop Foldaway Jumper, but he dislikes all the activities there. Bummer.

 Seff likes the toys here

The piano on this is educational too (make animal sounds)

Note : Prior to Seff's birthday, I made a busy board for Seff. The currect condition? Ruined with all appliances/components detached HAHA oh my baby boy

3. MEGA BLOCKS BIG BUILDING BAG

(Price : referhttps://www.megabloks.com/en-us/products/first-builders/big-building-bag-classic-60-pieces-dch55)

I do not think that anyone has grown up without building blocks. I even find myself hours playing with this at someone else's house, years back >.<

Size wise? Safe for a baby and growing up toddler. Unlike LEGO which is every parent's worst nightmare (if stepped onto)

I bought this when Seff is 9 months old, only now (when I google for link above) I realized it was meant for 12months+ old babies. What I can assure is that : a 9 months old do not even play with this, hehehe. Seff only chew the hammer and balls and that is all -at 9 months. And so I repacked this and reopened at around 11months.

Guess what? He instantly play (hit the balls PRECISELY) with this and he pulled out the xylophone, also curiously hitting it with the hammer provided to produce sound. He can play this for an hour (or so), and still playing at another time (did not get bored with this).

Too good to be true, but I love this toy! (made me happy as a mom)

Note : Seff also creatively trying to let a round block (Fisher Price's Shape Sorter) through the hole (it matches/of the exact same size) and the action caught me by surprise! Just how much a baby is actively thinking and being creative. I am a proud mom!

We are still in January, so I guess it's still legit to share my resolutions in 2019 which are :

1. Eat Healthier

I managed to eat healthier in early 2017, and shed some good amount of weight along the process. I started back then in January, so here we are again, January, I shall revisit my old self (apparently strong will) so we'll see. Previously I still indulged in fast food once a week, so I am nobody to be referred to in weight loss or anything, okay?

2. To Travel with Seff

Seff has started traveling across the country (local) as early as 2 months old, hehe. But to step up the game I will try to bring him abroad just to have the experiences, and learn more. In the mean time, I am quite content with work, with some issues at work (probably with people, not the work, haha fyi), so I don't think my applications of going overseas will be approved. Sigh. Frustrated, but well, that's life. I would not talk more about it since it will be bashing and bitching and that is not very nice thing to do hehe

P.s. Not to worry, the "person" is hated by everyone too

3. To Take Less Time on Social Media

I don't know where to start, but the thing about social media is really unhealthy. I entered few contests, winning them, and gained some followers -it was natural. And then I started to feel like I need real deal, real people and real connection, so I clean up my followers from around thousand to hundred. 

Over the time, I do the "cleaning" again, this time it was my friends who haven't even say hello to me for a while, do not even like my photos. I made an announcement too, saying I need to remove friends who did not like my photo(s) for a long time, almost to me it looks like he/she is hating my contents. Plus, I am going to give birth so my IG will be flooded with baby photos I believe. So, knowing that someone did not like me/my content disturbs me at that time

And finally, I made my IG account PUBLIC again. This time, I removed all the contents, leaving behind travel photos and some photos worth sharing. Nothing too personal, I believe

I use to follow so many people and I now need to stop. I started unfollow influencers that is promoting the same product over and over again, I see no honesty in that. This was last year. And then I started to spend more time watching Youtube, so I have some favourite Youtubers on my list. This year, it got so bored that everyone is started their own Youtube channel -so I stop watching them entirely. Seriously, guys?

To take less time on social media means I'd probably take up a new hobby, or anything. Will update about it in 6 months ++

Just like every year, I limit myself with only 3 resolutions, so that is all

Until next post!

I am quite a careful shopper (because I tend to save more money for 2 purposes : emergency & leisure) and I dedicated my time during 2.5hour-long lunch break on Friday to browse around stores and compare prices. Or is it only me that I tend to have super awesome memory, that I can easily spot which stores has better deals/price?

So this post is especially dedicated to mommies, because I noticed everything is highly priced when tagged/labelled baby! Welcome to motherhood, welcome to every parents' trap hehe

P.s. more money saved = more money for education

(Read : Knowledge is Power)

Listed down below is all I know about baby items I love and where you should buy them / should not buy them. In social media, sometimes I share tips and most of the times I left comment(s) on some other mommies' post(s)

MUSTELA SKINCARE

I always loved Mustela skincare range and its proven to cure cradle cap! Believe me if your baby has cradle cap, Mustela newborn shampoo (foam type) will cure them in around 2weeks! Seff started developing cradle cap around 2months old and I read somewhere that Mustela newborn foam shampoo is a great solution. Its true, after finishing one bottle and cradle cap gone, we bought another bottle but never use it anymore, which means once cured you'll never have to depend on it anymore! Cool, right? From 3months old until now we use Mustela cleansing gel from head to toe because its easier like that haha. And seriously the issue (cradle cap) never made appearance ever again..

Mustela skincare, I believe is around the same price of Buds, I don't get it why everyone keep saying to me why don't I use Buds, since its cheaper. I bought both, and during which Seff has cradle cap, we use Buds during his bath, thought the Orange/citrus scent will make Seff's head smells fresh but NO, it smells awful post-bath.. Thus, I am team Mustela!

WHERE TO BUY : Caring Pharmacy, MYR 65.90
(For Mustela Cleansing Gel, 500ml, refer : HERE)

WHERE NOT TO BUY : Mothercare MYR 70.70
(For Mustelah Cleansing Gel, 500ml, refer : HERE)

BABY SAFETY GATE

During baby's active phase, we obviously need to baby-proof the house, and among the highly priced item is Baby Safety Gate. I remember going to Quill City Mall, went to the Happikiddo and straightaway discussed with the SA there regarding their safety gate brands available, took some photos and left the store empty handed. I am still comparing prices at that time.. My final purchase? Bumble Bee from Little Whiz.. I saved up RM200! What an awesome purchase..

Same size, different brand, but until now the Bumble Bee safety gate has stand through time and tested with a 4 and 2-year old strength (they keep hentam that gate because they wanted to climb up the stairs hehe).

I personally love the Bumble Bee gate because to lock it, you can even use your feet. Can just tendang the door until closed because it has magnetic closure. MAJOR LOVE! Cannot imagined if I have Seff in my hands, and then I need to lift gate to open/close it. I wish to show everyone its magnetic closure system, yet older kids cannot seem to figure out how to open this gate hahaha

WHERE TO BUY : Little Whiz, MYR 300

(For Bumble Bee's base + 2 x 28cm extensions)

WHERE NOT TO BUY : Happikiddo, RM 500

(For Safety's base + 2 x 28cm extensions)

BABY DIAPERS

Since it's a daily necessity, so one must get it at a good price, right? Although my favourite diaper is BAMBO Nature, of exceptional quality which I will not further elaborated, sometimes I use common brand that has wetness indicator because that is one cool features too

I thought AEON sold Huggies (green colour pack) wayyyy to expensive. Alternatively, you can get cheaper price of this brand (Huggies hijau) at Jaya Grocer. Well, you can score many cheaper items in Jaya Grocer compared to TESCO and AEON. Surprised, yet?

WHERE TO BUY : Jaya Grocer, MYR 39.90
(For 60pcs M-sized diapers, refer : HERE)

WHERE NOT TO BUY : AEON, MYR 54.90
(For 60pcs M-sized diapers, photo taken in-store)

Dear my baby Seff,

Words cannot describe just how much you meant to me

Just how much you were a surprised, yet so wanted

You brings so much colors than a rainbow

I love you more and more each day if it's possible

You made me feel alive again

You made me have goals again

You made me have a purpose, have an important role

You made me want to be the best

You bring out the best in me

You make me a happier me ❤️

The cake-smashing session, however, was not a success hehehe

We found out that Seff is afraid of the cake! Not the minion cake, apparently.. >.<

Note : After the first session, Seff had a 1.5 hour long nap and still was in a bad mood. Took out the rug, add some toys and not much improvement made. Smile outside of the ring (with proof), cried again when is near the cake. Funny to watch! 

But there will always something new to learn, yes?


Cannot wait until next event -Akikah!